Another “I suck at life” post/stream of consciousness.

2-15-06

When it comes to workplace interactivity, I have a general rule of thumb: A closed mouth gathers no foot. Its usually as effective as it is old. I used to reserve this method for management, bosses and the like, but I’ve come to find that it’s usually a good idea to practice this more often than not.
Recently, however, I’ve begun to wonder if maybe Im not as good at judging the character of others, or perhaps even my own character as I had thought. People are tricky that way though. They are different than any other element in a persons life, I think, because of their capability to deceive.
For example, I am working in an administrative position at a large engineering firm. The thing that I like most about my job is that most everyone I work with is really smart. At almost all times, people are busy doing actual important work, work that actually affects our lives, communities and environment. Almost every project underway at our firm right now is genuinely interesting to me, and at the end of the day, something to be proud of.
So everything is perfect right? I found the dream job, and what else could there be?
Well, yes and no. My job at this firm is miniscule and dispensable. I am an assistant to the Receptionist, among other things (office bitch, lets say). When I first started everything was hearts and stars all the time and I couldn’t believe my luck. Then, (recently) the Receptionist pointed out a few mistakes I had made and basically threatened my job. On top of feeling like I could get fired at any moment for any little thing, the Receptionist has also taken up the habit of being a bitch to me at any given time for seemingly no reason. Pancho says that this is a direct result of my “closed mouth” rule of thumb, and that I need to start standing up for myself to her.
This receptionist happens, also, to be a type of person that I am all too familiar with. The type that will be your best friend and talk shit to no end about everyone else. The catch is that, in all likelihood, she is talking shit to no end about you to everyone else as well.
I guess what it all comes down to is this: be my friend or don’t, employ me or don’t, because what gets under my skin is the fucking unnecessary deception. So, what’s a girl to do? Often I find myself planning to take the Receptionist aside and say (in a nut shell) “What the fuck is the deal? You and I don’t have to be friends, just quit ruining my perfect set-up here! I want to go back to loving this job and I cant until you stop being so bi-polar!” but I end up talking myself out of it under the pretense that her attitude isn’t worth actually risking my job over.
Thoughts?