My hair

Honestly, have you ever looked at my hair and not wondered, "What the fuck is going on there?" My hair is a strange entity, a fifth element, perhaps. My hair could probably have its own government if it werent under the tyranny of some unknown evil force. Seriously, my hair is definitely not a democracy.
My hair takes at least 20 minutes to wash, 2 hours to cut, an hour and a half to straighten and about 5 or 6 hours to color. My hair has no regard for any scientific laws - or reason itself for that matter. It sheds at an alarming rate (in the shower, in the brush, on my clothes, on your clothes, in the sink, etc.) yet never thins.
My hair has struck fear into the hearts of countless professional hair dressers, and once it nearly convinced a beauty school student to drop out.
When people ask "is your hair naturally curly or straight?" I say "my hair is naturally a mess."
I have a chunk of hair behind and slightly above my right ear which I am convinced is from another planet. It is a small grey streak of matter that appears to be hair, but will not dye (even with dyes designed specifically FOR grey hair). I've even taken a sharpie to this inexplicable substance, but to no avail.
My hair has different ethnicities - some of it looks like black girls' hair, some of it looks like white girls' hair, some of it is of an ethnicity that hasnt even been discovered yet.
When I was younger I constantly wanted to shave my head and buy a wig, but Im glad I never did. After all, would I be the woman I am today had I not battled my hair all my life?

Probably not.


xo