Sunday, September 07, 2008

Karma and God do not exist

Or, a rare and really pissed off rant.

Sometimes I really fucking hate life. Sometimes I feel like nothing good comes from making the effort to get out of bed every day and contribute to society.
I am a generally good person. I help people when I can, Im patient, I do the right thing, I mediate, Im generous, I try to spread around as much good karma as I possibly can. Im not fucking special by any means but I find it hard to accept that life just SEEMS so much easier for everyone else I know.

Alright I'll cut the shit. I know life is fucking hard for everyone. I know you all are struggling too. Im stressed the fuck out. Im sick of being lied to and taken advantage of.
Right now Im watching Groundhog Day and Im starting to really relate to Phil Connors because I feel like every day is the same fucking day with no progress whatsoever. Except he gets to kill himself a million different ways with no ramifications.

Im tired. Mentally, physically, emotionally. Im on the cusp of being jaded. My toes are jaded and by next weekend my feet will be jaded and then my ankles and so on.

Someone punch me in the face.

3 comments:

kungfuramone said...

I hear THAT, renegade!

Something specific set you off, or is it more of a general FTW kind of thing?

Alexis said...

I prescribe a vacation to New York where there'll be no accommodation fee, if you can do it... That would be sweet!

But barring that, just a lot of rest. In my studies on hating life I've found that tiredness is a catalyst to many of the nastier strains.

XO

Chrissy said...

KFR - this is a discussion for email. Trust me.

Alexis - I *will* be in NY some day, but that day isnt very soon. Until then I will be doing my best to rest.

xo